punch me

you know those bottom weighted punching bags? they often have them at carnivals, painted like bozo the clown. by the way, what it is with clowns for children? they're not fun, they're creepy!! anyway, those punching bags look like this:

you punch them again and again and again, but because they're weighted on the bottom, they just annoyingly pop back up every single time. and that stupid clown, my friends, is what i feel like so often in life.

i feel like i am constantly getting knocked down, crushed by bout after bout of winding blows. and yet, i have to somehow figure out how to get back up and dust myself off, just to be knocked down again. wtf. my, what a glutton for punishment i am.

but no, if i think of it another way, i have to laud myself for my resiliency. and i do. because sometimes i take a look at the landscape around me and i see other punching bags that have lost their fight. they got too tired, too timid, too scared, too hurt, and so they deflated themselves. they let someone or something else take their air out and steal their light from right underneath their noses. what a shame, because there is another way...

every time i get knocked down, i get to keep that scar, that trauma, that lesson, that weight. because i earned it. and i get to add it to the pile of weights at my bottom. and over time, with every hurt that i am willing to endure and take on, i actually become sturdier and more stable. it's going to be harder and harder to knock me off of my center.

yeah, so keep punching, life. i got this.

(nyc)

the art of travel

aaahhhh, i'm so excited for my next trip that i'm practically salivating. in fact, i'm already almost all packed. a month in advance :)

there's something that i just LOVE about airports. all the rushing and chaos and brightly lit corridors. i know most people dread them and love to complain about the state of travel these days, but to me, it's all just a part of the excitement! and i absolutely love love love the people watching. i like checking out the destinations board with all the different airlines (international ones are always infinitely more interesting to me), seeing how people are dressed, ogling all the overpriced candy at the newspaper stands, imagining who the first class passengers are and what they do, and wondering about the lives of passing flight attendants. everything and everyone is moving at a higher than normal speed with a firm destination in mind. i love it. i love it so much that i actually don't mind getting to the airport way early.

and then once i actually get tucked into my seat and we break through the clouds, i am always fascinated by this concept of being neither-here-nor-there. for those few hours, we are all in a moment of mid-air suspension, flying through time and space. quite a miracle, isn't it? and within this silver capsule, it seems as if someone just hit the pause button on life. the time i have right then and there, just hanging, is one of the few moments i have of being totally out of touch yet so in tune with my thoughts and my body. if the passenger next to me chats me up, i could honestly be anyone i want to be. i could make up a whole life story and they would never know. and somehow, just that thought alone, frees me up to start thinking - who is it that i want to be? what's going on in my life right now? i don't have to be anywhere, answer to anyone, and have absolutely no control over how to get from point A to point B. so i just ride, looking out at the clouds, drinking my tea, just reflecting, just breathing, just being.

whenever i go somewhere, it's always a game to see how little i can pack. i pull together all my favorite clothes first, then slowly whittle it down from there, trying to see what can be worn easily multiple ways. usually it comes down to a pair of jeans, black pants, leggings, a couple of tanks, then a few shirts both short and long-sleeved. a sweater, my motorcycle jacket, a dress that can be dressed up or down, a baseball cap, some underwear/socks/bras, a swimsuit, flip flops (for the hotel), flats, sneakers and a pair of heels. i still haven't figured out how to take less shoes than that, which bothers me. it also always surprises me how much space toiletries take up, even though i have a very minimal maintenance routine. hmm, still working on those parts. as for the plane ride itself, i always take a scarf, my own tea bags, a water bottle that i fill up once i get past security, antibacterial wipes, magazines, and of course, snacks. good ones include walnuts, hummus, crackers, carrot sticks, oranges or grapefruit (the fresh scent makes such a welcome difference in the stale air), cherries, grapes, snap peas, oatmeal, and instant miso soup or cup of noodles for longer flights. throw in a pair of sunglasses, my phone+charger, wallet, passport, and i'm set. i can fit everything in a compact carry on plus purse and i love feeling so efficient. kind of like george clooney in "up in the air" hehe :)

why do i love being a nomad so much? it's not just the places themselves i love to go, but even just the act of getting there... all the preparations, the anticipation, the constant adjustments i have to make to arrive at my destination. i wish i felt that way about all things in my life, this journey, this process...

as always, to be continued...

(nyc)

#travel #nomadic #traveltips #airports

happy new year world!!!

"it is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. the credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."

- theodore roosevelt

#manypathsonelove #walkinblessing

(nyc)

the art of spoonage

via

i met up with one of my oldest friends today, and as we criss-crossed the city walking and talking through central park and rockefellar center, we discussed the delicate nature of relationships commonly known as big spoon-little spoon.

what makes one a big spoon and makes the other the little one? there are all sorts of realms this covers, from everyday responsibilities (who cooks? who gets up early to walk the dog? who plans the dates or the travel?) to financial/career to even physical, but most importantly, what about emotional? usually big spoons tend to be the givers, forgivers, providers, while little spoons like to be nurtured and coddled. big spoons are respectable and admirable, but honestly, who doesn't love being the little spoon? i firmly believe that even the biggest of spoons want to be little spoons. because we all love being appreciated and feeling cared for.

i think that's the trick. that no matter how it's weighted in all other areas, as long as one feels valued, respected and a little adored, everything kind of balances itself out in the end. of course there are those who just have no clue what's even going on, but as long as you're not an emotional fork (the ones not even in spoon territory!), a little awareness and gratitude goes a long long way.

keeping life simple :)

(nyc)

new year, new steps

recently i went hiking at runyon canyon in LA, one of my favorite little spots in the city.

i like the hike because it's easily accessible, doesn't take a lot of time, and gets you up and moving. there's a part of the path though that can be steep and strenuous, if you go up the hard way. on a hot day, it makes it even harder. but after doing it three days in a row, i noticed that the hike got easier and easier, and i got faster and faster. i also realized, i didn't have to run up the mountain and be superwoman, i just needed to put one foot in front of the other and get to the top. my pace didn't matter, so long as i finished, because going slow was better than not going at all.

we are conditioned to think that life is supposed to happen like it does in the movies - unsurmountable obstacles, heroic actions, instant life-altering outcomes. but life is actually a lot more like runyon. not the biggest baddest hike ever, but just challenging enough to require some amount of proactivity. and it's the everyday conditioning, the daily habits and small choices, that propel your life in a forward momentum. it gets easier. and whether you are a tiny dog, a super famous celebrity, or just a regular joe schmoe, we all walk the path the same way - step by step.

#manypathsonelove #walkinblessing

(los angeles)

random videos: like

are you aware of what you eat?

diagnosis: serious case of wanderlust:

oh greece:

intro for an animated film festival in korea! done by a kick ass director, christopher kezelos, that i've collaborated with before to do translation edits and brainstorming sessions for ideas:

i seem to like cartoons... the child in me is still jumping with glee... :)

(nyc)

don't judge...

(nyc)

emotional residue

how clever you were
to let me think that i was the one in control
that i held the key to your cage and i had locked you up
when in reality
it was you who had let me stretch my legs
stretch my heart
how absolutely foolish of me
to believe that i had become free of you

a single look
and i am right back...
to this.

hello old friend
so we meet again

you are the price i pay to be human
to be a lover
to be a warrior,

of light.

(nyc)

just give me a reason...

this song moves me to a place i haven't felt in a long long time... it makes me ache...

(nyc)

eşref armağan

isn't it amazing, what we are capable of knowing, seeing, doing, even without the conventional means of doing so? i came across this last year and this artist resonated with me so...

a followup video that was done with him:

and i truly believe that faith works in the same way. we don't need to see to believe, we already instinctively feel and know so much more deeply and truthfully with our spirit... we just have to trust ourselves more, to know that it's all real, all of it...

(nyc)

anais nin

"each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."

(los angeles)