the art of spoonage

via

i met up with one of my oldest friends today, and as we criss-crossed the city walking and talking through central park and rockefellar center, we discussed the delicate nature of relationships commonly known as big spoon-little spoon.

what makes one a big spoon and makes the other the little one? there are all sorts of realms this covers, from everyday responsibilities (who cooks? who gets up early to walk the dog? who plans the dates or the travel?) to financial/career to even physical, but most importantly, what about emotional? usually big spoons tend to be the givers, forgivers, providers, while little spoons like to be nurtured and coddled. big spoons are respectable and admirable, but honestly, who doesn't love being the little spoon? i firmly believe that even the biggest of spoons want to be little spoons. because we all love being appreciated and feeling cared for.

i think that's the trick. that no matter how it's weighted in all other areas, as long as one feels valued, respected and a little adored, everything kind of balances itself out in the end. of course there are those who just have no clue what's even going on, but as long as you're not an emotional fork (the ones not even in spoon territory!), a little awareness and gratitude goes a long long way.

keeping life simple :)

(nyc)

new year, new steps

recently i went hiking at runyon canyon in LA, one of my favorite little spots in the city.

i like the hike because it's easily accessible, doesn't take a lot of time, and gets you up and moving. there's a part of the path though that can be steep and strenuous, if you go up the hard way. on a hot day, it makes it even harder. but after doing it three days in a row, i noticed that the hike got easier and easier, and i got faster and faster. i also realized, i didn't have to run up the mountain and be superwoman, i just needed to put one foot in front of the other and get to the top. my pace didn't matter, so long as i finished, because going slow was better than not going at all.

we are conditioned to think that life is supposed to happen like it does in the movies - unsurmountable obstacles, heroic actions, instant life-altering outcomes. but life is actually a lot more like runyon. not the biggest baddest hike ever, but just challenging enough to require some amount of proactivity. and it's the everyday conditioning, the daily habits and small choices, that propel your life in a forward momentum. it gets easier. and whether you are a tiny dog, a super famous celebrity, or just a regular joe schmoe, we all walk the path the same way - step by step.

#manypathsonelove #walkinblessing

(los angeles)

random videos: like

are you aware of what you eat?

diagnosis: serious case of wanderlust:

oh greece:

intro for an animated film festival in korea! done by a kick ass director, christopher kezelos, that i've collaborated with before to do translation edits and brainstorming sessions for ideas:

i seem to like cartoons... the child in me is still jumping with glee... :)

(nyc)

don't judge...

(nyc)

emotional residue

how clever you were
to let me think that i was the one in control
that i held the key to your cage and i had locked you up
when in reality
it was you who had let me stretch my legs
stretch my heart
how absolutely foolish of me
to believe that i had become free of you

a single look
and i am right back...
to this.

hello old friend
so we meet again

you are the price i pay to be human
to be a lover
to be a warrior,

of light.

(nyc)

just give me a reason...

this song moves me to a place i haven't felt in a long long time... it makes me ache...

(nyc)

eşref armağan

isn't it amazing, what we are capable of knowing, seeing, doing, even without the conventional means of doing so? i came across this last year and this artist resonated with me so...

a followup video that was done with him:

and i truly believe that faith works in the same way. we don't need to see to believe, we already instinctively feel and know so much more deeply and truthfully with our spirit... we just have to trust ourselves more, to know that it's all real, all of it...

(nyc)

anais nin

"each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."

(los angeles)

presence.

this brought tears to my eyes.

back in 2010, the artist marina abramovic did an installation performance exhibit called "the artist is present" at the MOMA. each person would get one minute to sit across from her while she would just be fully present with that person, often bringing them to tears.

"marina abromovic and ulay started an intense love story in the 70s, performing art out of the van they lived in. when they felt the relationship had run its course, they decided to walk the great wall of china, each from one end, meeting for one last big hug in the middle and never seeing each other again."

when marina did her piece at the MOMA, ulay arrived without her knowing and this is what happened:

my god, life is so beautiful.

(nyc)

eunoia

my favorite new vocabulary word ^_^

(nyc)

just. beautiful.

this gave me a totally new understanding of yoga, love it:

#seanecorn #yoga

striving...

(nyc)

fresh squeezed

if you squeeze/beat/pummel/etc an orange, you get:

voila! orange juice!

what happens when you come under pressure? what comes out of your insides? how do you handle yourself and what does it say about you?

it's easy to be nice, smiling and beautiful when all is well. but when it's game on, that's when true character comes out...

as for me, i need to learn to be more patient :p

(washington dc)

up close and personal

did you know that this - sand -

underneath a microscope looks like this?

amazing, isn't it?

i was walking down park avenue today when i suddenly teared up at the thought of someone that i miss very much from time to time. when i think of him in the general sense, i totally appreciate his overall beauty and the wonder he brought to my life.

he crossed my mind today, just for a moment. but some reason, i didn't just think of him this time, i felt him. specifically. and that's what made my heart ache. i could see the outline of his skinny face, his crinkly blue eyes and i remembered what it felt like to walk next to his tall, lanky amble.

details. they've been on my mind. i've been learning more and more that it's the details that give us something to latch onto. the tiny little crooks and curves and hollows are the building blocks of our lives, our works, our loves. some of us get mired down and lost in the minutiae, while others never learn to focus beyond the big hazy outlines. obviously the trick is to learn the balance, but i've always tended to process the whole before the parts.

but over the past few years,  i've started realizing the magic intricacy of specifics, more and more. today's memory reinforced this lesson for me in an ever more concrete way.

i'm working on building something, and i'm excited about the individual specks of sand. but i also can't wait to pile together a whole beach for everyone to play on.

s, i know you're always there with me in spirit and i'm forever grateful for your angel wings and guidance.

working, hustling...

(nyc)

 

 

just one breath

to begin centering...

new year, new start.
God, help me with this mountain i'm about to climb because i'm not even sure how big it is.

(tulum, mexico)

happy new year world!!! ;D

#yearofthehustle #gonnamakestuffhappen

huuuuuge smile on my face

every. single. time. i watch this:

love love love.

(nyc)

feeding souls

i sometimes do this for fun:

i've always loved cooking, entertaining and having people over. some of my earliest memories center around the huge dinner parties that my parents would throw, when my mom would wear her special long dresses.

i love the creativity of imagining dishes, pulling them together and serving them to the hungry hungry hippos. it genuinely makes me happy to feed my friends, which is why i started helping friends and then even friends of friends with their parties. i've done dinners for 10 and dinners for 150. give me a credit card and a kitchen, and i will help you get everyone fat, drunk and happy. food nourishes our bodies, but the act of getting together in festivity nourishes our souls as well. a good dinner party does that.

which is why it bothers me when people are dismissive and look right through me. i don't do events full-time, this is not my regular job, and even if it was, why should that mean you lose your manners? i do this because i enjoy it, and i'm actually here as a friend of the host because they don't know how to do everything and need help. but i often get mistaken for "the help" and it's interesting how people's true natures come out. i see the social climbers, the arrogant schmoozers, and the too-cool-for-school posers with the "fancy" job titles. in a different setting, these are the same types that want to network with me because i went to the "right" schools and know the "right" people. really?

but then there are the special ones. the ones who look you in the eye, say thank you and ask questions. i appreciate them the most because they are why i do what i do. i'm there to make sure you eat, drink and be merry.

so my hats off to you, humble partiers. i'll toast to you because your appreciation makes the world a brighter place, and there will always be a place for you at my dinner table.

bon apetit and cheers!

(nyc)

um yeah, i said that.

in my defense, i've been sick and coughing up phlegm all week...

my lovely sister posts this up to facebook with the caption "my sister, the genius. hahaha...."
;D

(nyc)

swph

a love letter to you, dear little one...

i remember... i remember chasing you around the parking lot and covering you with kisses when i would catch you. i remember that one perfect picture we took. i was kissing you on the cheek and it made you so happy, you winked at the camera. and everytime i came over, you showed me that photo. it was a reminder of you, of us, of our time together. and that picture stayed frozen in my mind for all the years that came after that, and i know it did for you too. it bound us together and it created a special place in the both of our hearts for each other.

i remember smothering you with affection, even as you grew up and moved away, and every point of contact i had with you was drenched in fondness. but the points grew further and further in between and i got busy... and seeing you after all those years, last thanksgiving, was amazing. i'm so glad i forced your dad to drive all that way. and i would've taken the heat for you a million times over when you got in trouble with him... i wish i would've kept up better, but i kept thinking we had time. you got better and i thought you were ok. you were young, you were strong, you had beaten it already. 

you're frozen at 3 years old for me, you always were. and 3 is too young to go already, too fast to leave this party when you just arrived... i think you could tell, right? how proud i was to see you, to know you again... but i'm happy for you, i feel joy for you, because i know how light and free you are right now. and i know you know all my thoughts and love for you, the unspoken ones...

little one, go in peace... the love remains, always... always... we shall meet again soon enough... 

your highest truth

i had an interesting conversation with a friend not that long ago. we were talking about how most men are afraid of being tied down and forced into a commitment, so most often, they're found running away in order to remain "free." and he said that his fellow mates were so silly and they had gotten it all wrong.

"they've just never truly been loved by a woman. because once you've had that, you have no appetite for anyone less." my friend went on to tell me how he had no tolerance for young girls, for stupid games, for anyone afraid of standing in their own full power. he explained that being in a real relationship had actually liberated him, rather than tied him down, because she kept challenging him to become bigger and fuller and more beautiful of a person. "i would not have discovered the depths of myself had she not made me step up. not because she kept provoking me, but because she was so full and aware of herself, that it made me want to match her light."

what does that say about you if you're afraid? afraid of being a man? afraid of a relationship instead of seeking out the liberations of one? why is commitment a bad word, when you wouldn't hesitate to commit to a winning company, a rewarding career, or even a losing sports team? what are you so scared of?

and what does it say about you if you're afraid of being a woman? afraid of unleashing your brightness?     and why are you chasing a "commitment" from someone else when your greatest commitment will always be yourself?

people get confused... i'm seeking light and freedom, that's the end of the story. maybe you'll join me, maybe you'll continue to wander in the shadows... but i promise you, the leap is worth it.

(nyc)