running through my head today

don't assume without asking first.

don't judge without walking in the shoes first.

i don't understand gossip, that's just plain unattractive.

always give the benefit of the doubt, i may need it one day too.

i have too many books in my room.

i don't want to do my taxes.

i want to donate all my clothes and give everything away.

inside i feel like a caged animal today.

don't forget the sweet potatoes in the oven.

(nyc)

you asked

a) respect:  love starts with respect. without this foundation, we're not going anywhere. it even trumps trust. i need to respect you first, and vice versa, before i'll play ball.

b) the golden rule:  it's really simple. treat me as you would want to be treated. if you want loyalty, consideration, fun, etc - be that person. it'll come back to you tenfold. and actions speak louder than sweet nothings.

c) be your best self:  you owe me nothing other than to be the best person you can be. i will be your biggest champion. i don't want your money, your title, your fame, your accolades - b/c i have my own dreams. but i want all of that for you. i want you to want it. no wimpiness, no excuses, no cowering, no insecurities. own yourself. balls out.

d) gratitude:  recognition that none of us gets anywhere in life without the life support of love, from above, from behind, from your side. you are better than everyone, yet better than no one. don't let pride or ego marr your beauty.

e) humor:  i still think poo jokes are funny... :)))

(nyc)

as is.

you were made exactly the way that you are for a specific reason. all your seeming "flaws" are by design, all your obstacles are on purpose, and all your doubts are simply tests. in His eyes, He sees nothing less than beautiful, nothing less than His own perfect creation. He is the alpha and the omega - no mistakes were made. so why do you question His designs? why do you question His purpose for you? why do you spend so much time trying to figure out what is wrong with the world, wrong with the people in your life, wrong with yourself, when all of that is simply irrelevant? it is, truly, wasted energy.

why are you not using all that you were given to propel yourself forward, make your mark, be the example others want to follow? stop waiting on others, stop waiting for the perfect time and the perfect situation, stop waiting for your internal self to catch up with your external self or vice versa.

just be.
just act.
you are beautiful.
as is.

(nyc)

choices

all signs point to...
it's been awhile since i made a life-changing leap.
am i scared? without a doubt. too many unknowns.
but i don't want to hesitate too long and get stuck.
follow the energy, my gut, my intuition...
and the energy is going... that way...

what's in store? can i really do this? how?
why am i like this? i can't stay, can't stop.

catch me if you can.

(nyc)

one month

will finally be in ny for a full month, no traveling. time to put the work in hardcore. 30 all-nighters to set up the next few months. big things.

making it happen.

(nyc)

bedtime

friday night:  6am
saturday night:  9am
sunday night:  4am

i need to go home.

(las vegas)

good day

this city makes me giddy happy, and the weather alone has so much to do with it.

if i were to live here, i would love to live high up in the hills for this:

every time i see this view at night, i just feel peaceful inside.

on a funny side note: in a city this big, i happened to sit next to the same two guys at a cafe yesterday and at dinner tonight! what are the chances... they sat on my left, and then randomly on my right, one table down, happened to be a friend from new york that i hadn't seen in awhile. two new friends, one old friend, it's a small world after all.

(la)

to my bitches

for elena, sunny, juyoun, sora, bora, kate, soomi, eunjee, sam & gina:

thank you for showing me the beauty and power of being a woman, for giving me a community & for supporting me in my quest to be laughably sexy. i felt like such a powerhouse on that stage tonight, but only because i was backed up by each and every one of you in your own full power. i wouldn't have felt so empowered without you. i have never been prouder to be a woman, a girl, a female.

you all turn me on.

(nyc)

high

love the feeling of nailing something.
love the feeling of being onstage, underneath the bright lights.
love the feeling of being surrounded by fucking strong cast members.
love the feeling of support, laughter, tears and feedback from an audience.
love being able to show everyone, what it is that i exactly do, what i spend my days and nights preparing for, sweating for, sacrificing for.

home.

(nyc)

charged

it's the most amazing feeling when i know my lines cold. when i can spit out pages and pages of lines without hesitation, so that i can just riff with them. it makes me feel like:

haha :)

things are popping!!!!!

(nyc)

flowing

i was definitively told - things will start flowing from here on out. i heard You.

and i'm feeling it.

i'm actually living the life that i want to live, creating the work that i want to create and meeting the people that i want to meet.

thank. you. God.

(nyc)

response to the fucking blonde idiot

love this. enough said.

(nyc)

japan

dear japan,

it is hard for me to fathom what you are dealing with and understand the enormity of the situation from afar. someone asked me if i feel more linked to the disaster b/c i was just there, but oddly, the answer is no. it is still hard for me to comprehend what you are going though b/c it must be so different from the inside.

something that struck me: even in the worst of times, there is no looting, no pillaging, no stealing. you line up for supplies, recognizing that everyone is equally in need, and your concern for everyone prevails in the face of disaster. everyone pitches in their part, no matter how small.

for every emotion i feel today - sad, happy, angry, anything - i will also be grateful for that privilege, and send that thankfulness your way. i want your nation to be overwhelmed with positivity right now. i believe in the power of collective prayer and goodwill, and i, along with millions of others around the world, are sending you the best of our thoughts and hearts.

(nyc)

work hard play hard

dear af:

one day you will read this, no doubt. i want you to know - thank you for showing me what is possible.

when i see what you've done, which is incredibly incredibly impressive, it's not intimidating - it's motivating. because you show me, concretely, tangibly, that it can be done. and i see that it's not easy by any stretch of the imagination, but yes - it. can. be. done.

you are one those "rich & famous" but i've been lucky enough to take a peek behind the curtain of oz, and what i see is this: you work harder harder hardest than 99% of the rest, and watching the pleasure you take in your work is pretty fucking awesome. i am honored that you respect the work/results i've accomplished with you, that you genuinely care about where i am personally, and that you even automatically set a place at family dinners for me without a second thought. that part means a lot.

you inspire me. your work ethic inspires me. your 260mph attitude towards life inspires me.

i want to be able to stand next to you and feel justified in my own right, to feel as successful - but while i'm working on that, thank you for making a place for me at that table where i want to be belong.

(nyc)

alone

how is it possible to feel both empty and full inside at the same time?

(nyc)

your smell, your smell...

"if, of thy mortal goods, thou art bereft, and from thy slender store two loaves alone to thee are left, sell one and from the dole, buy hyacinths to feed the soul."  - saadi (12th century persian poet)

the myth behind:

hyacinth was a youth beloved by both apollo, the god of archery, and zephyr, the god of wind. however, hyacinth preferred apollo, and out of jealousy, zephyr caused a violent wind to arise one day when hyacinth ran after a discus. the discus hit hyacinth, killing him, so apollo then created the hyacinth flower to spring out of the ground from his spilled blood.

out of passion springs beauty.

my favorite flower :)

(nyc) 

all that glitters

fast money
fast boys
fast lifestyle

consumption to the umpteenth
luxury in exponential

moving markets
moving escalators
it's a small world after all

but who is actually a primary here?
not a feeder, but a maker
not a quote unquote rainmaker
but a designer

make the pyramids of cash
of gold
of women

then what do you want to spend it on
what are you trying to fulfill
what appeals to you

what remains.

(hong kong)

shots shots shots shots

random pixx from the past few weeks:

clubbing in tokyo... they all just get really drunk and don't move, they just stand there...

ordered a coffee jelly thinking it would be some kind of a cool drink with jelly cubes, but nope. it was literally coffee jello.

saw my genki sudo boys again!! fated.

at the meiji shrine. best prayer card ever.

two little maids in japan... @ takeshita-dori in harajuku.

one of my fave bars in the world. top of the park hyatt in tokyo at bar new york.

i'm on a boat... listening to justin bieber :))) baby baby baby ohhhh... at lamma island

og grandpa, chillin' outside his shop in hanoi

best use of english ever.

say what?!

best cao lau, so yummy in hoi an

i've never felt so connected to the earth as i did in the rice paddies...

(hong kong)