scaredy-cats

for as long as i can remember, i have always loved talking to people. learning from them and about them, asking questions, curious as to what makes a person tick, their dreams, their passions, their fears.

but somehow, so often, my inquisitive nature gets mistaken for a) romantic interest or b) interest with some kind of underlying motive, when this is totally not the case. i just truly love celebrating what makes a person unique and beautiful, and discovering what s(he) has to offer the world. but insecurities come into play and suddenly i become the suspicious one. my interest becomes second-guessed and then the door shuts closed.

why am i not allowed to recognize you? why am i not allowed to find out what an amazing human being you are?

could it turn romantic? yes, it has before. but i fall in love all the time, with men, with woman, with children, with old people. that is the whole point. of life.

interestingly, the more successful, the more famous, the more "powerful" a person is, the more likely they are to not only open up to me, but to ask me questions in return. there is a reason why they are where they are. you cannot pick and choose the aspects in which to open yourself up to the universe. you're just either open to all of it, including the so-called "bad" stuff, or you're not.

what kind of energy do you emit and draw? how open are you, really?

and how open am i? i'm trying, always have been. let me in, let me out, let me be.

let me be me.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." - Marianne Williamson


(nyc)